No complaints here though (except the so-called food, and I'll leave it at that). They have, well! They have (ta-da!) an individual movie/television/games screen for every single person on the plane and it is possible to re-watch, for example, American Beauty or Lost in Translation, view the new television version of This American Life, The New Life of Old Christine, and even Everybody Loves Raymond. Oh, stop! It is too funny! He is not weird! Okay, he is weird, but I like the show anyway. So the whole long flight thing matches perfectly with my genetic pre-conditioning to sit around and do nothing. Of course it is very very hard to sit around and do nothing when you have a million things to do, you want to do them well, and you are very anxious. Unless you are on a plane to Japan.
But on the trans-world (basically) flight, you are trapped! It is true that screen-nausea sets in at some point, but so what? Then you read for awhile. Not exactly a chore. Actually, not that easy when the lights are out and one is queasy, but that little t.v.-majig sure is handy. This American Life on television is actually just as good as it is on radio. But wait, I think I wandered down the wrong aisle here.
I went away, yes. Television, not exactly my intended path. I realized, once I was very very far away, that my life's pieces fit together rather well. It was not the many shrines with fortunes I was welcome to leave if I did not like. It was not the Japanese philosophy that I studied (I didn't really). It was the cliche, actually, of having actual time away that helped me to appreciate my long marriage to my difficult husband, and his long marriage to difficult me, my friendships (the many and the few), and my family. I did not really need to contemplate my feelings about my children, but it helped me to realize how well they are doing, in their own ways, and separate from me.
There were shrines and trees and people with histories of their own families dating back many generations. There were wide street
s selling Prada and Gucci and there were rice paddies flying by my eyes on the bullet train. There was a lot of sweat on my back. The green tea tasted like nuts and foamed on the top. The teachers work until 11 p.m., and the teenagers wear shirts with English on them. At a baseball game, people cheer in unison as they pound two rubber bats together. All of the merchandise was in English. Pictured here is the Torii gate, right next to the island of Miyajima, which has a series if docks and a shrine where we heard people chant. Why was I so far from my family? I wondered a bit what they would think, but had little time to consider. We were always rushed. Most of it was experience and taste. And the badger-dog, a funny little creature that looks like a cross between a racoon, a fox, and a terrier.Friendships here and there: the many and the few. There were women on the trip with whom I found it quite easy to strike up a conversation, so to speak, chat, laugh, and with whom I could envision having a friendship in the future. There were some women just a few years older than Big Kid. They seemed so brand-new, even compared to him. When I thought of the people I care about at home, I realized how much time affects me. There is simply no replacing it. That's not to say that my older friends are better friends, but that it takes me quite awhile to trust in a friendship, and often I am becoming good friends with someone without even realizing it.
For the last few days of the trip, I was convinced something bad had happened to our dog. I was sure Ball & Chain was not telling me because I was too far away to do anything. I seem to have developed a fear of sudden bad news and the dog probably symbolized something someone with a PhD in pop psychology could analyze. We were only on email, but why did no one mention something about him being cute, or doing something silly? When I arrived home, it turned out that the dog was fine.
Chrystal's husband (Chrystal is my closest friend) had had a major medical crisis while I was away. It seems like he will be okay, but surely his life is altered, as is hers. So my revelation that my stacked-up neurotic worries were inconsequential seemed to be true. Unfortunately, my dearest friend's life had become so stacked that no amount of distance or movies can change that reality. This is not the neat ending I had planned to write, and I had not even been thinking of Chrystal when I began, but how could I not? Some people believe in fate, or reasons. I believe that I have strong connections with a lot of people so I will be a sturdy friend to Chrystal. And I do hope sometime she gets to Japan, or at least a place without worry.
