Tuesday, March 07, 2006

The Oscars Are Bullshit and The Wrong Kinda Whine

Brokeback was a precedent-setting film: every movement and still moment on Heath Ledger's face created a character utterly believable, miserable, and sadly wise. The chemistry between the two actors was also precedent-setting: in what other film have we seen two people pressed up and seeking each other like Ennis and Jack the first time they reunite on Ennis's steps?

The Oscars were pathetically mainstream. How innovative is a running fag joke? Everyone is scared shitless to offend African Americans in any way, but we can say whatever we want, we're all pals with "Will & Grace."

Movie actors are not the self-sacrificing altruists Mr. Clooney described: they may be artists, but they are not as innovative or political as some of them think they are. Reese Witherspoon, for example, is not an Oxfam worker, despite her yearning to matter. And would someone please reach down Ms. Witherspoon's throat and adjust her voicebox? That thing is like interference on an old radio.

2 comments:

  1. Anonymous11:53 PM

    i've been 'commenting' in my mind all week but just haven't had time to reply to all your posts. Yep on Oprah. Or, rather, a big fat Nyet on oprah. You nailed it. (her cheesy psycho-babble makes me wanna barf. i started noticing about ten years ago that people in their twenties were talking in this weird, opraesque fashion, using formerly concrete nouns like "space" and "place" and "ownership" and "voice" in all annoyingly abstract, self-referential ways that feel like chalk on a blackboard to me. Even my shrink started talking about doing "a piece of work" with me. I blame Oprah for this nonsense. She's got everybody started on all these journeys to their "centers" and to places in their heads and god knows where else and now we're all supposed to feel great about being underpaid losers (and did I mention i once saw her coming out of Tiffany in Chicao carrying, oh, 19 turquoise bags under those cut arms) because now it's apparently okay to be totally and completely inarticulate in addition to narcissistic and irritating. Memo to Oprah: Just f-ing talk like a normal person! (I do like her magazine, though.) Okay, next target. Yes on new voice for Reese Witherspoon. Check. Next? Denial. Yep, denial is good. Yes, indeedy. Love your link to Go Fug Yourself. Have you seen awfulplastic surgery. com?? Cheers. p.s. Have you blogged yet on menstrual flow? I took a quiz and I am officially bleeding to death every 3.5 weeks.

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  2. That is totally fucking hilarious. Must do that piece of work for myself and look into my own menstrual center.

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